Adoption starts in a dark place.
Every adoption we have been involved with over the past fifteen years starts in a dark place. Of course it does. Any time a child needs a home other than their own something has gone terribly wrong. We have also seen in so many ways how adoption shines a light into that very dark place.
Over time we have also seen another phenomenon of that light. It doesn’t just shine into the darkness of one room it bends around corners, travels through time and illuminates many other places still in the shadows.
having your conduct honorable among the Gentiles, that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may, by your good works which they observe, glorify God in the day of visitation.
1 Peter 2:12
When you’re in a dark room and the tiniest flicker of light appears suddenly it is physiologically impossible not to turn and focus on it. It is a neural reflex, part of the autonomic nervous system. It always gets your attention. It cannot help but have an influence on your consciousness when you’re in the dark.
For the past fifteen years Sacred Selections families have been shining lights into dark rooms, providing love and hope for 374 children, influencing adoption attorneys, agencies, social workers, birth mothers, courts of law and judges around the country. Countless numbers of people have shared in the adoption journeys of so many couples. These couples have inspired others to follow in their steps, spurred others to many acts of “love and good works”, increased and deepened the experiences of fellowship.
The way everyone has worked together, conducted themselves in good times and under adversity has and continues to make a deep impression in the minds of non-believers. Your good works are being “observed” and people are glorifying God because of them.
Dana received a text message in the early part of this February [2021] from a woman that owns an adoption agency. Beth [not her real name] is not to our knowledge a believer and this was apparent when we first worked with her. Over time, however and in the course of working with Sacred Selections and dozens of these Christian families, we began to hear comments like, “I just love working with your families.” “I wish all of the couples I work with were like Sacred Selections couples.” In this particular case, the agency owner had been working with a birth mother struggling with matters relating to post adoption visits and contacts. This is frequently a “touchy” subject for both the adopting family and the birth mother. There are so many deep emotional issues involved, guilt, fear, anxiety, privacy etcetera involved. It’s a very sensitive “dance”.
The text Dana received was sharing a conversation about such post placement requests or even demands. Beth was trying to balance the rights, concerns and realities of these matters to the birth mother. At the end of the day, the issue was what was reasonable, practical and could be relied upon…In other words “TRUST”.
The “room” was dark for everyone involved during these discussions. Beth drew on her many experiences working with good, trustworthy couples and connected those attributes with the fact that they were Christians.
That was the LIGHT, the hope and the confidence that showed through the darkness and allowed the journey to move forward.
All of you who are and have been a part of these journeys, this work and these stories, are “walking in the light” and it shows.
